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Welcome to Modern Britain - a country where you can be arrested for pinching a few crisps from a schoolfriend, throwing cream cakes or denying the existence of Santa Claus - while burglars, muggers and drug dealers go about their business unmolested by the forces of law and order. Two years on from the ground-breaking Wasting Police Time and Diary of an On Call Girl, the trilogy is complete - as the most senior police officer to date breaks ranks to tell the shocking truth about the collapse of the countrys criminal justice system.

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